How Do You Learn To Love? Is It Even Possible?

Some days it is very hard to love. I must admit, that love has been a hard struggle for me over the past several years. After being in some detrimental situations as well as relationships with family, so-called friends and well myself…I really found it hard to love anyone. Now that I’ve gone through the fire as they say, I still feel like I have a lot of maturing to do before I fully understand what love is. 1 John 4:28 says, “Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen”. My struggle with this has been…how do you love someone that doesn’t love you? It’s very easy to share this emotion towards another human being that returns the same emotion back to you. However, there were so many days when I did share my “love” with people who in turn only used it to their advantage. Thus, I shut down…completely. Now that I am blessed to say I have met people who truly are my friends, and have built relationships that are no longer harmful to my self-esteem. Over time I have even learned to forgive those who intentionally and unintentionally harmed me. I have learned how to love again. 

  Yet, there are those days when I run into people who just aren’t happy with life itself and I have to find a way to work with them whether it’s the cashier at the grocery store, the receptionist in an office where I need to handle business or wherever! So what am I beginning to realize in all of this chaos?

I realize that, regardless of what happens you really can love everyone. I am not saying that you have to be the best of friends with everyone nor do you need to be around people who are “dangerous” to themselves and you. What I am saying is that if you are determined to have this, “love” in your heart, then you must not let anyone or anything stop you from…loving. No it will not be easy, I never said it would be. Yes, the woman or man at the post office who doesn’t like their job or is having a bad day will still be rude and inconsiderate. However, it is your choice on whether or not you allow their negative attitude to taint your perspective on loving another human being. Sometimes you will have to be the bigger person, look inside yourself, find a resolution and keep it moving! Yes, people may hurt you but you can’t allow that to stop you from being a whole, well-rounded human being. Love is a part of being whole and I rather be whole any day than have a gaping hole in my heart because I allowed hatred to chew me away.


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